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Writer's pictureBill

Teenagers vs. Worms

We have two teenage boys on the farm. They are great, but can be confounding to other humans. It got me thinking about a comparison between worms and teens.

Where worms excel:

1. Teenagers insist on going out in the cold wearing shorts and a thin jacket.

Worms burrow deeper to avoid extreme cold. (Cocoons won't hatch if conditions are too cold or hot.)


2. Teens can give off some powerful odors, personally and in their rooms.

Properly maintained worm bins do not smell.


3. Teenagers question your judgement - all the time.

Worms might try to escape from a poorly managed bin, but without eyes, you'll never get "that look" from worms.


Where teens excel:

1. There's a ton of pride in watching your teen succeed in life.

There is a sense of pride when the worm bin is humming along just right, but it's not the same.


2. If you raise them right, your teenagers will clear the snow from your driveway and mow your lawn to save your aching back.

Worms won't lift a finger to do any household chores.


3. Every now and again, you see the potential of a great human being shine through in your teens, and your love for them is endless.

Worms can't hold a candle there.


Where it's a toss-up:

Teens will eat you out of house and home. (Seriously, we buy milk so often, we're on a first-name basis with the entire staff at Cumberland Farms.)

Worms can eat approximately half their body weight every day.

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